@JIASILI: "I just wanna go back to the time where we have all the time in the world to chill, play, eat and catch the sunset together."
I HAVE NEVER SEEN THIS PHOTO IN MY ENTIRE LIFE UNTIL THIS MORNING. And I’m in it. What’s in the bags near us? Where were we? There’s probably an entire album of photos that accompanied this, but I really can’t remember a single detail, despite having thought about it for the entire day.
I do miss the purity of those times; our spontaneous morning BBQ, sitting down in the middle of nowhere and simply talking, stoning, pondering… I miss the sunsets, the morning runs + physical trainings and helping each other to tie our hair for competition. I miss the girl who tried to act tough but was completely seen through & protected by these wonderful souls. I miss the girl who threw the ball repeatedly at the school wall to get rid of her anger. I miss the steamboat dinners and the Christmas potluck parties and how we naively promised that they would be a yearly tradition. I miss the muscle memory and the intense chemistry & support I felt on court with these girls, even though I was nowhere near a “good player”.
But I have also accepted its passing. It is a closeness that we can never recover nor recreate; a circle that has been broken somewhat permanently. I know that my memory is limited and unreliable. I know that I still have my words, these photos and the deep lingering warmth in my heart.
I also know that while some of us have drifted apart, we have separately moved towards little circles/clusters/pairs of friends within the team and are even closer then we were before. So I just wanna say:
The Chickenrice Team is still the best team I’ve ever been part of; It will be hard to forget how it felt to be part of a family. Some of us don’t talk anymore, things may be awkward if we do meet again, but I still feel a special affection for you girls. Thanks for the memories (:
… are the most frustrating things ever. )*#&^%$!